Who Tricks an Angel?
by TriforceWisdom64
Summary: Shortly after "Viridi's Angel", Pit, Piturai (Dark Pit), and Phosphora join Palutena in a war against Viridi and Hades! Rated T for mild language and violence with a possibility of quick escalation.
1. Prologue

The voice of the Viridi, Goddess of Nature, faded from Pit's head as he flew behind a flawed clone of himself and the electrifying girl (literally) that he kind of liked. Piturai and Phosphora flew at a moderate pace, which worried Pit a little because he didn't have the unlimited flight they had. Palutena was supplying his disfunctional wings with the power to soar through the air - though he never really got to admire the view, since he was usually shooting amd dodging Underworld enemies. Now he got a perfect, unobstructed view of hell. The trio had yet to leave the Underworld, and the heat from all the lava below them was starting to get to them. "Hey guys, I don't mean to be a bother..." Pit started, wiping sweat from his forehead.

"Then don't say things like 'be a bother'," Piturai shot back. The black-clothed-and-winged copy of Palutena's captain seemed to be in a bad mood, and was not afraid to show it. Pit was a bit confused by that, since Medusa had just been slain and they had just escaped Viridi's army. What would Piturai be mad about at this point?

"Well sorry for trying to be polite! Anyway, can we speed up? My wings are getting warm, and I'd rather not end up hotter than the lava down there."

Phosphora turned around to face them, still flying in the same direction. "Yeah, let's hurry it up. This dry heat sucks for my complexion!" Neither Pit or his counterpart understood that comment, since the lightning spirit still looked as breathtakingly beautiful as ever. Regardless, they quickened their pace.

There was a break in conversation - if you could call that ^ a conversation - in which Pit tried for the fifth time to communicate telepathically with Palutena. _"__Palutena, can you hear me? Please, just talk to_ _me!" _At this point, he wasn't surprised when he didn't receive an answer. He didn't get how she could control his flight path, but not talk to him. And why the heck were they still in the Underworld?!

His attention snapped back to the world around him when Piturai said, "We're almost there." He pointed to a cave up ahead.

Pit wasn't expecting to hear that. "What? Palutena is in the Underworld?"

"You'll see."

Nothing more was said until they reached the cave. As soon as they were inside, Pit's jaw dropped in amazement. Apparently, Palutena wasn't all that was in here. All of Skyworld was here, in all its shining glory. The only thing missing was the sky, but the smooth walls and floor of sky blue-tinted crystals gave the illusion that it _was_ in the air. It was a spectacular sight, even after seeing Viridi's fortress full of exotic, aether-dwelling plants. Speaking of aether, Pit could feel that the air in this cave was clearly full of the divine element. He felt just a little stronger, faster, and smarter, a phenomenon that many mortals envied. Best of all, he heard Lady Palutena's voice.

_"Pit, you made it!"_

Pit couldn't beleive his ears. (Well, technically her voice was in his brain, not his ears, but still, you get the idea.) "Lady Palutena! I can hear you! I can actually hear you!"

"We can hear you too, so quit yelling!" Piturai spat, not a hint of a smile on his face.

Phosphora, on the other hand, was trying her best to smile. Tears were welling up in her eyes, clearly not of joy. Pit didn't notice, though, as he flipped and spun in the air.

_"Alright, Pit, land in my temple,"_ Palutena's voice said. _"__We have some catching up to do!"_

"I missed you so much, Palutena," Pit said as the trio descended into the temple of the Goddess of Light.

()

The blue glow left Pit's wings as he landed in the foyer of Palutena's palace/temple. He could hardly believe his eyes when he looked up to see the person he'd missed for over a month now, the Goddess of Light, the kind and beautiful Lady Palutena. A wide smile crossed his entire face, and he ran forward and hugged her tightly. "Lady Palutena! I was so worried about you!"

She hugged him back and smiled down at him. "I was just as worried about you, Pit! How was Viridi's place? I hear she has an eye for interior decorating."

Pit laughed. "It could never compare to Skyworld, Palutena!"

Phosphora burst into tears. Pit let go of Palutena and turned to see Piturai hugging the Lightning Flash while she cried into his shoulder. He flashed Pit an annoyed look.

"Um, did I say something?" Pit asked nervously. "I'm sorry if I offended you somehow."

Phosphora wiped the tears from her face. "No, it's fine. It's just...I betrayed my sworn oath to Viridi, to Nature. It feels so wrong. I shouldn't be here."

Piturai hugged her tighter. "You did nothing wrong. Viridi betrayed the world when she started using those Reset Bombs."

Before Pit could say anything stupid, Palutena grabbed his hand. "Pit, come on. Give them a moment. We have some very important things to discuss. They'll catch up in a moment."

* * *

><p><strong>Okay, author's notes time. I would like you guys to private message (PM, in case you didn't know what PM stood for) me with ideas for this story. To be honest, I haven't thought it through very much yet. Hades and Viridi will definitely be in it, but I was thinking of adding a few extra plot twists to make it more interesting (and to justify the dramatic title).<strong>

**Thank you so much for reading! Peace out, guys!**


	2. Plan of Action

**From now on, any and all bold text is an author's note.**

Once they were all seated in Palutena's rarely-used war chamber around a round table, Pit asked, "What did Piturai mean, about Viridi betraying the world? I mean, I called Viridi out on being selfish. What did she do?"

Palutena looked him in the eye with a grim expression on her face. "She's using her Reset Bombs to wipe out humanity."

Pit had heard nothing of this (unlike everyone reading this story) during his time in Viridi's service. "What?! That's terrible!"

"Yes, I know. She also kept me from helping you this whole time. Before she went to war with Medusa, they combined their forces and their magic and caused Skyworld to fall right out of the sky, and into the Underworld. They thought we'd burned up in the lava, but as you can see, we made it okay. The Centurions are readying for war as we speak."

Pit smirked. "Yeah, right! We can beat Viridi easily with me, Piturai, and Phosphora all working together!" Nobody said anything for a moment. "Uh, right guys?"

"There's another issue," Piturai said. "Or rather, another enemy. You killed Medusa, but we found out how she got revived in the first place." He paused, seemingly just for dramatic effect. "Hades."

"Er, who's Hades?" Pit asked honestly.

Piturai facepalmed hard. "Sweet Elysium, we're all going to die."

Palutena took a deep breath. "Pit, Hades is the true God of the Underworld. You know, he who hath fallen from Olympus?"

Pit rubbed the back of his neck. "Uh, I was never very good at history."

"It was only a thousand years ago. Practically this morning!"

Piturai slammed his fist down on the table. "We don't have time for this! As we speak, both of our enemies are preparing to attack us! We need to get to the briefing."

Palutena cleared her throat. "Yes. Um, Pit, I don't know how to tell you this..."

Pit jumped out of his chair. "Go ahead! Lay it on me!"

"You won't have any help from anyone other than me combating Hades."

Pit fell back down in his chair. "Say what now?"

Phosphora, who's eyes were still a bit red from crying, said, "Viridi's amassed a huge fleet of Reset-Bomb warships. The Centurions, Piturai, and I are...are going to..." She started tearing up again.

Piturai quietly finished her sentence. "We're going to destroy the fleet and..." He paused to think of a good word. "...terminate Nature and her commanders."

Pit tried to think of something to say, be it clever or just plain idiotic, but nothing came to mind. "Uh, well I guess on the bright side, Hades doesn't have much of an army right now."

Palutena considered that. "Yes, but don't underestimate him. He's extremely clever and could probably pull the silk over our eyes at any moment."

"Uh, don't you mean wool?"

"Wouldn't be caught dead wearing wool. He's a man of wealth and taste."

_**Pleased to meet you. Hope you guess my name. Oh yeah.**_

"Anyways," Phosphora said, to get the conversation off of Rolling Stones song references. "Do we have any new developements to discuss before I can get some sleep?"

Palutena bit her lip. Not a good sign. "Um, yes, there is. One of Hermes's agents contacted me. Due to a split vote, the Olympians will not interfere with our wars unless the Aether realms come under attack. And apparently, Skyworld doesn't count," she added bitterly.

"Dammit!" Piturai cursed. "I was counting on getting Ares's help taking on an entire fleet of warships. That's just his thing."

"Well, he'd probably switch sides to always fight for the losing team. Keep the war going. It might be for the best Olympus won't get involved. Though Athena's wisdom would have proven useful."

**Don't worry, Palutena. You have TriforceWisdom! Wait, I'm fighting - er, writing - for everyone. Oops. Never mind, you're on your own!**

Looking nervously at the others at the table, Pit said, "So, that concludes the meeting?"

Piturai stood up abrubtly. "Yeah, I need some shut-eye. Got a big freakin' day tomorrow."

Palutena stood up gracefully. **Wait, what? Wow. Pit had gone without seeing the Goddess of Light for so long, he noticed that she was graceful standing up from a chair. Wow. I just wrote that. **"Yes, everyone needs rest for tomorrow. We have a long battle ahead of us."

* * *

><p><strong>That line ^ is supposed to show time has passed, but since I use my () symbol, I'll use that ^ to end chapters.<strong>

**That bit of pointlessness said, don't forget the whole "PM me with ideas" thing, because I meant it when I said I haven't thought this through. I just thought it had been too long since Viridi's Angel ended.**


	3. Scouting Things Out

_Pit was finally flying by himself. Flying! He twirled freely through the sky, through bright fluffy clouds...that were quickly turning gray. Now he flew through a storm, lightning flashing all around_ him._ Each thunderclap resounded in the voices of the people he knew, too loud to understand. Oh, wait, this was a dream._

_He heard the deafening voices of Palutena, Viridi, Piturai, and Phosphora, who all sounded angry. No...scared? It seemed to alternate between anger and fear. Suddenly, a stray bolt of lightning hit Pit as it traveled between clouds. He screamed in agony, his voice joining the ones he heard in the thunder. He felt a burning sensation on his back, then a rush of wind as he fell downwards. He strained his neck to look behind him, shocked at what he saw. His wings had been burned off!_

_The clouds disappeared, replaced by open air. Pit was falling fast, down into the realm of mortals, then into the ground. Walls of rock rose up around him as he tumbled into the Underworld. Demonic laughter as loud as the thunder from earlier filled Pit's ears, and the giant purple-and-green face of the laughter's source was the last thing Pit saw before giant hands clapped him right out of the air._

"NO!" Pit screamed as he woke. He frantically looked around...still in the same room he went to sleep in. _His _room, in the second-tallest tower of Palutena's castle-temple. Not very relaxed, he fell back on his pillow and held his head in his hands. He didn't know how he knew, but he did. The god in his dream was the Lord of the Underworld, Hades.

()

"The Three Sacred Treasures are in no condition to be used in battle," Plautena said flatly. Pit was gearing up to head out on today's mission: scouting out the Underworld to try to find Hades' castle. Medusa's castle had crumbled to dust when she died, so that was out. It was also possible that he didn't have a castle at all, but a specific target would give the good guys a serious advantage in the coming war.

But now Pit was being told he couldn't use the armor, shield, wings, and bow that made up the greatest divine set ever made. "What?!" he complained childishly.

Palutena put her hands on her hips. It was a very motherly gesture, which was fitting since Pit was acting like a spoiled kid. "Pit, you know very well that the Treasures have been tainted by Viridi's greensmiths. Using them could have catastrophic effects. We can't risk it."

Pit still wasn't happy. "Well then, what weapons do you have?"

The Goddess of Light smiled. The air in front of her shimmered as an object was made to appear. Pit could hardly believe his eyes. It was Palutena's bow, freshly repaired since the battle with Tabuu before the last Smash Bros. Tournament. The weapon had been severely damaged in the fight, and he'd used a Silver Bow in the tournament instead. Palutena let the bow float dramatically. in front of her for a few seconds. "Go ahead and take it, Pit!"

Pit reached out slowly and wrapped his hands around the blue-and-gold frame of the bow. He held the bow for a moment, then turned toward the railing of the hallway-balcony (Plautena had some interesting architectural design ideas) and brought his hand to the string, a thin line of blue light. His fingers tightened around the string, and when he pulled his hand back, a blue arrow with two golden rings around it formed out of pure energy. His arm also had two golden rings around it, which had no practical purpose other than looking really cool. Taking a deep breath, he let the arrow fly out over Skyworld. It left a trail of sparkling blue light as it flew, and upon reaching its limit, it exploded right in the center of Skyworld, bright as a star.

Pit turned back to Palutena with a huge, silly grin on his face. "This is incredible! You fixed it!"

"I stayed up all night to make sure you could use it today," Palutena said. "It's the most powerful weapon in my possession, aside from the Treasures."

Pit saluted. "I will respect your hard work and the value of this gift, and..."

Palutena laughed. "Just be careful out there!"

Dropping the salute, Pit said, "I will, Lady Palutena."

()

An hour later, Pit stood before the door in the tallest tower of the castle. It rose right out of the center of the castle, overlooking all of Skyworld. Normally when he stood here, he could look out over the whole world, but being in a cave in the Underworld made that difficult. He held Palutena's bow on his left hand, his right hand on the door. With a quick shove, he opened the door. Then he sent out a thought to the Goddess of Light. _"Palutena, are we ready to go?"_

He didn't even have time to remeber what it had been like without her voice in his head, because the answer came to him right away. _"Of course we are!"_

Without hesitation, Pit leapt from the tower. After half a second of free-fall, his wings glowed bright blue and carried him out over Skyworld. He held his arms out like a bird as he increased in speed, reaching the cave exit in seconds. He noticed that there wasn't much activity on the islands, and he saw why when he exited the cave. The Centurions sure were ready for battle! They had assembled a fleet of war chariots fueled by pure Goddess Power (copyright of Palutena Fuel Inc. all rights reserved). They were armed to the teeth with bows, spears, slingshots, and cannonballs to be thrown by the Strongarms. Flying at the front of the army were Piturai and Phosphora, armed with a Dark Pit Staff and Beam Claws, repectively. Phosphora smiled sadly and waved, clearly still upset by the betrayal of her mistress she was committing today. Piturai simply nodded to acknowledge Pit's presence before turning back the to Centurions. Pit returned Phosphora's wave and turned in the direction of...well, nothing in particular. The Underworld's magma ocean stretched out before him for kilometers.

He put his head down and allowed his wings to bring him up to mach speed. _"Hey Palutena, is there anywhere specific I'm headed?"_

_"Well, no," _Palutena answered. _"To be honest, I'd like to have you go with Piturai and Phosphora. But I want someone I really trust to be here in case Hades tries to make a move. I wouldn't want to leave Skyworld defenseless in the enemy's home turf."_

_"Understood. I'll just keep my eyes o-oh-OH-WOAH!" _Pit ducked to the side and Palutena moved him further in the same direction, behind a volcano. An Underworld Gatekeeper with a squad of MonoMikNoses had appeared in his blind spot and opened fire instantly. He moved out from behind cover for a moment to let loose a charge shot, but quickly ducked back when a barrage of shots came straight at him. "Dang!" Pit said out loud. "Palutena, what can you see?"

_"My all-seeing eye isn't working well in the Underworld," _she told him in a panicked voice. _"It's not even easy to keep you in the air! You're going to have to fight them on your own."_

Pit peeked out for a split second and was almost hit by several energy beams. "Yeah, thanks, Palutena."

_"Sorry."_

Pit reached around the rock face so that only the his bow would be visible and fired another arrow. The now-familiar volley of returning shots rushed by, but couldn't possibly have hit him. He heard the satisfying sound of an enemy - he wasn't sure which one - breaking apart as the arrow hit it. Two Monoeyes and a Mik (the remnants of a MonoMikNose) rushed around the rock face to attack him, but he quickly cut them down after splitting his weapon into dual blades.

Pit cracked a smile as he repeated the strategy. Apparently the Underworld soldiers were too stupid to see the pattern, because they fell one by one until only the Gatekeeper was left. Pit sprang out from his hiding place and attacked his last enemy head-on. He knew from his previous encounter with a Gatekeeper that it had several weapons attached to it's body that he'd have to take out before going in to melee the artificial nerve endings on the left side of its head. And...well, he did that. Not much more to it.

"HIIIYYYYAAAAAHH!" he yelled unnecessarily as he delivered a sweet kick to the beast's weak spot. Sure enough, it spiraled downwards into the magma before exploding, sending a beautiful shower of hot lava flying up and down at Pit. "NO NO NO PLEASE NO!"

_"Just hang on, Pit!" _Palutena called. _"My powers of cooling should keep you mostly safe!"_

"MOSTLY?! OWOWOWOWOWOWOW! Oh, it's already over." Pit examined the minor burn marks on his wings, clothes, and skin. "Yeah, I was mostly safe. Thank you, Palutena!" As if suddenly remembering the fight he just had, Pit looked around frantically with an arrow nocked. "Are there any more monsters? We good?"

Palutena chuckled. _"We're good, Pit. There don't seem to be any more. Though the presence of a Gatekeeper troubles me. Maybe I should bring you back..."_

"What? No, I just got here! Just send some healing orbs my way and I'll be good to go!"

_"Alright, Pit! If you think you can keep going, we'll keep going. Healing orbs on the way!"_

Pit collected the orbs (which look a bit like fish eggs, I noticed) and continued his flight through the now-empty skies of the Underworld.


	4. Springtime's Sword

**Wow! Sorry this took so long to get posted. I meant to have this chapter out a week ago. Also, I think I sometimes switch between metric and customary measurements in my stories, so I hope nobody is annoyed by that =)**

Pit saw the obsidian shore of the magma sea coming into view on the horizon, and within seconds, he was there. A few more seconds passed, and he reached the ruins of Medusa's castle. Sure enough, both of the Underworld Gatekeepers that had been deployed to fight Nature were in pieces on the ground. "They're both here, Palutena," Pit said.

_"Darn it," _Palutena responded in his mind. _"So Hades is already deploying troops. I hoped we had more time..."_

Pit surveyed the wreckage of the palace. Magic had been used to make it much larger on the inside than on the outside, so to Pit, it looked too small to be the place where he defeated Medusa for the second time. As he looked at the empty husks of Underworld monsters and Forces of Nature that littered the ground, he thought he saw a flash of light in the shards of the castle. "Woah, hey Palutena? Did you see that? Set me down."

_"Er, I didn't see anything, but I'll let you look,"_ Palutena said as she directed Pit to the surface. His wings stopped glowing and returned to their somewhat useless state.

He began climbing over broken parts of the castle walls and roof, though none of the interior seemed to have...well, existed. At least not here. Magic worked in strange ways sometimes. "Wow," he said. "This place looks like the old Smash Castle after the Subspace Emissary."

_"Um..."_

"It's destroyed."

_"Ah."_

Pit caught sight of the glowing object again. He moved slower so he could approach whatever it was without being detected. He reached the top of a pile of rock, and his jaw dropped. The glow emnated from the knee-length white dress, shoulder-length blond hair, and...skin...of a beautiful woman. She looked about Palutena's age and wore a necklace of pearls.

_"Um, Pit? Pit!"_

"Huh? Woah!" Pit snapped out of his gawking and slipped off the pile of rubble. He fell painfully on a stone carving of Medusa's head. The mysterious maiden, caught by surprise, spun to face the angel. He quickly stood up and brushed himself off. "Uh, sorry. The name's Pit, servant of Palutena. You are?"

The woman's surprised look turned to one of disinterest. "Oh, yes, the god-killer," she spoke in a voice smooth as silk and warm as sunshine. **(Did that even make sense?) **"I know who you are. You killed Medusa, and in doing so, ruined my summer home."

"Uh, your summer home? Medusa's castle?"

_"Oh, of course! Pit, that's Persephone, Hades' wife!"_

Persephone looked to the dark sky. "Yes, Palutena, I'm Hades' wife. Don't remind me. I'm literally in hell with that guy."

"Er..." Pit stammered, rubbing the back of his neck. "That, uh...kinda stinks."

"You didn't know who I was until just now, did you?"

"No, Persephone."

_"Persephone, your majesty, forgive my angel's lack of knowledge regarding Olympian history."_

Persephone crossed her arms. "What do you want, light goddess?"

Pit scratched his head. "Yeah, Palutena, what do you want?"

The queen of the Underworld shot Pit a look. "Quit copying people just to sound smarter. It doesn't work."

_"Um...could you please tell us where your husband's castle is?"_

"Palutena, I don't like my husband, but I am still loyal to him."

Pit thought about that for a moment. "Sounds more like slavery than marriage."

_"Pit, you can't address a goddess that way!"_

Persephone narrowed her eyes at the angel. "No, no, it's quite alright. Tell me, Pit, why do you so willingly battle with beings far more powerful than you, all just because one of them tells you to? I speak from experience when I say gods cannot be trusted."

Pit took a step back. "I...I..."

_"Pit, don't let her get in your head!" _As she said this, Palutena was practically _screaming _in his head.

"You can keep making the mistake of following a goddess," Persephone spoke in a voice that Palutena recognized as Charmspeak, a power the light goddess had thought only Aphrodite could use. "Or, you could leave Skyworld and make your own choices, your own life."

Pit's face had gone pale. "I don't...Palutena is..."

_"Pit, she's Charmspeaking you! Damn you, Persephone!"_

Persephone's calm composure quickly turned to rage. "MAKE YOUR CHOICE, ANGEL!"

"SHUT UP!" Pit screamed as he raised Palutena's bow and nocked an arrow, aimed right at Persephone's face. "I trust Palutena to lead me down the right path, and that's what matters! And if you won't help us stop Hades, you are an enemy!"

The Underworld queen smirked. "Very well. If you enjoy picking fights with gods, then so be it. Have at you!" With that, her dress fell away to reveal armor of black Stygian Iron, a metal found only in the Underworld. Hung at her side was a blade of the same material, about as long as the bow Pit held. She drew the sword and held it loosely at her side. The two stood still for a few seconds, then Persephone spread her arms in mock frustration. "Come on, now! Take the first shot!"

After another moment of hesitation, Pit released the string of his bow, no more than a few feet from his opponent. Next thing he knew, the arrow came back at him and hit him square in the chest. He tumbled to the ground and smashed into a brick wall, which promptly collapsed on top of him. He took about fifteen seconds just to pick himself up, Persephone chuckling the whole time. He looked from his bow to her sword. "Did...did you deflect that?!"

The goddess laughed out loud. "Indeed I did! Now it's my turn to attack!" She lunged forward with inhuman speed and nicked Pit's cheek with her blade. He put his hand to his face and brought it back with golden ichor on it, the blood of celestial beings. He looked around frantically, but his enemy was nowhere to be found. Then he felt a point poking the small of his back. He turned just his head to see that Persephone had her sword pressed against him. "Challenging me may have been a mistake, young angel." With that, she slashed hin across the back, causing him to cry out in pain.

_"Pit!"_

Pit split the bow into its dual blade form and swung as Persephone struck again. Their weapons clashed and they stood in a deadlock. "What are you the goddess of?!" Pit screamed, exasperated.

"Springtime." A few seconds passed before she realized why he was asking. "Oh, I have alot of free time when I'm down here. I chose to practice fighting. You can imagine why." She spun around and sliced, but Pit deflected the blow. She continued to move much slower than earlier as their blades clashed again and again. It was obvious she was going easy on him, but it sure didn't feel like it to Pit. She was still a highly skilled swordswoman. She stepped back and spun her blade on one finger. "What's wrong, Pit? Getting tired?"

Pit was panting and had his hands on his knees. "Palu-*pant*-tena, I'm s-sorry I went and picked a fight with a g-goddess."

_"It's alright, Pit. I think it's time to get you out of there." _The familiar golden light surrounded Pit as Palutena began extracting him. _"We have more productive things to do than losing a fight to the Goddess of Springtime."_

Persephone sheathed her sword, and her dress re-materialized over her armor. "Well then, until we meet again, Pit!" Her black eyes turned red. "And we _will_ meet again."

Pit was left to wonder what she meant by that as he was pulled back to Skyworld.

()

Pit reappeared in the grand hall of Palutena's palace. The Goddess of Light stood a few feet away, a troubled look on her face. "Welcome back, Pit."

Pit rubbed the back of his neck (which seemed to be a habit of his). "Is Persephone going to be a problem in the war?"

Palutena sighed. "Most certainly, Pit." She smiled. "Let's have something to eat."

"You read my mind!"


	5. Battle for the Skies

**In the skies above the mortal world...**

"We just lost a destroyer on the left flank!" Piturai yelled to his Centurion wingmen. "Cover the weak spot! I'll be fine, go!" The squadron leader nodded and directed his troops to the empty space that the fallen chariot, which had been armed with crossbows and catapults, used to occupy.

Piturai turned back toward the oncoming fleet of Nature's advanced warships. They were made mostly out of pink crystals of some kind, with various plant and rock bits tying the pieces together. He had no idea what was powering them, but he couldn't see how such a thing could possibly be "natural." They were armed to the teeth with energy weapons that seemed to channel concentrated sunlight into heat beams (basically, the ships had laser cannons). About a hundred of the ships occupied Piturai's field of vision, each one a mile long. Thousands of the Forces of Nature poured out of the ships' hangars, but the armies had yet to meet in no-man's-land.

On his right, Phosphora stood on the back of another Destroyer-class light chariot, manned by three Centurion Strongarms. The sun was right behind her, causing her golden hair to shine brighter than...Gah! This was definitely not the time to be thinking about that. Had Piturai been paying no attention to the author's description of armies and lasers? In any case, the Lightning Flash looked over at him with a grim expression and nodded, signifying that she was ready to fight. He turned and faced their enemies once more.

"CHARGE!" he yelled.

Phosphora lept from the chariot and sped off through the air at supersonic speeds. Piturai followed, his wings glowing purple with Pandora's stolen power. The Centurion army backed them as they clashed with the Forces of Nature, and all hades broke loose.

Piturai was armed with an Earthmaul Club for the close-combat capabilities and long-range ballistic projectiles it could fire. Phosphora had transformed her scarf into a new kind of bow which amplified her electric powers. Side by side, they bashed away every enemy that came close enough and fired ranged shots at every enemy that was far enough away. As he clubbed a Nutski away and tried to look ahead at the enemy warships, Piturai was startled by the wall of enemies blocking his view. There were so many more than he'd predicted - over a million of Nature's soldiers were moving quickly toward them. Behind him were only a hundred thousand or so Centurions with a distinct lack of lasers. He and Phosphora had faced both the Underworld Army and the Forces of Nature above Medusa's castle, but Viridi had clearly been holding back in that battle.

The enemy troops began moving outward from a central point, creating a tunnel that led straight through to a warship with a glowing bulb on the end. Piturai's eyes widened. "SCATTER! GET AWAY FROM THERE!" Most of his troops did so, but a few Centurions and chariots got hit with the full force of the Reset Bomb that had been shot at them. The pod exploded, engulfing more than a hundred chariots in its organically pink mass of plant and rock matter. Piturai tore his eyes from the sight and watched as the enemy troops refilled the empty air, once again blocking the entire enemy fleet from view.

"Piturai!" Phosphora called out. "I have an idea!"

"Better than anything I had!" he replied.

"The next time they try to use a Reset Bomb, tell our guys to use every fire weapon we have against it! The bombs are made entirely out of Aether-grown plants. We might be able to cause a malfunction!"

Another hole appeared in the enemies' wall, with another deadly piece of produce behind it.

"You heard the lady! Go for it, Centurions!" Piturai ordered. Three dozen chariots armed with flaming arrows and fireball catapults gathered at the opening and opened fire (with fire) on somewhat distant bomb. The outer shell began to burn away slowly, revealing swelled-up spots glowing bright green. "Woah, woah! Attack those glowing spots! That's gotta be a weak point!" Phosphora joined the Centurions in shooting the targets, and the bomb's shell exploded off. Underneath was the weapon's core. A couple of their chariots edged away as the enemy warship prepared to fire. Piturai launched a powerful shot from his club. "Stay on target! We can get it!"

The ship fired, and the bomb came flying toward them. As it reached the enemy line, the core burst into flame and exploded, engulfing the rather flammable Forces of Nature in combusting bomb fragments. The enemy soldiers struggled to move past their allies and get away from the spreading wildfire. Their thick wall of sentient beings was quickly turning into a falling bunch of burning wood.

And the hole they had formed to let the bomb through was getting larger and larger. Phosphora flew through, followed by the Centurions who were now poised to recieve some cheesy achievement, like "Weed Killer" or something. Piturai turned to the remainder of his forces. "Everyone through here, now! Destroy their warships!" Palutena's army cheered battle cries as they rushed forward with renewed morale, attacking Viridi's warships and detonating the Reset Bombs they were armed with.

()

In her headquarters on an island in the Mediterranean Sea, the child-sized Goddess of Nature was throwing a God-sized tantrum.

"NOOOO! NO! NO! NO!" Viridi stomped up and down as she screamed and pulled at her hair. Arlon the Serene didn't laugh, smile, or flinch away from his leader, though he felt a desire to do all three. They didn't call him "the Serene" for naught (his fancy way of saying "nothing"). He appeared to not react at all to Viridi's breakdown.

They were watching the battle unfold through images produced by enchanted rays of light on a waterfall - essentially the world's first moving picture projector. The system had been invented by Iris, Goddess of Rainbows, but that was completely irrelevant to the plot. Where was I? Oh yes, Viridi was raging harder than kids her physical age (she is a goddess) playing Call of Duty.

"Dammit, dammit, DAMMIT! I knew they'd figure out our weakness is being shot at, but I thought it would take much longer!"

The Rock-Monster-Man Cragalanche peeked through the doorway, and Arlon waved him away.

Viridi continued ranting. "It's all Phosphora's fault! Backstabbing creep!"

This was what Arlon had to deal with every time Mistress Viridi lost, which had been quite a bit lately. And yet she never accepted any of his strategic advice, hardly ever acknowledged his existence other than demanding he remain and listen to her scream utter nonsense.

And Arlon the Serene waited...and listened...and waited...

**Hades=God of the Underworld; hades=Greek hell.**


	6. Hades' Grand Entrance

**Late. Late. Late. This chapter is _late. _It's also long, though, so hopefully that will make up for the wait =).**

"We've got them on the run!" Piturai said to the misty image of Palutena floating in front of him. He was still at the site of the air battle that was just coming to a close. "As we guessed, their weakness is fire. And hot damn, there's a lot of fire here!"

Back in Skyworld, Palutena's image of the dark angel shifted to show several burning Forces of Nature battleships falling out of the sky. "Excellent." The light goddess was relieved that her relatively small, poorly-trained army had beaten Viridi's countless soldiers, but she knew that Forces of Nature could form just about anywhere plant life existed. The war was still far from over, and nobody had even heard anything from Hades yet. Still, they had won today and would still be alive tomorrow. "Take out any stragglers and bring the army back to Skyworld."

The shimmering image returned to Piturai. "Have a feast set out for us, if it's not too much trouble. I've hardly eaten since I smashed that mirror weeks ago!"

Pit, who had been standing next to Palutena, was indignant. "Hey, I smashed the Mirror of Truth! You just happened to fly out of it!"

Piturai mock-saluted. "Back in an hour!" The misty projector screen disappeared.

"Well, I wouldn't mind a feast," Pit said. Palutena frowned. "Er, sorry?" Pit apologized.

"Huh? Oh, it's not that, Pit." The Goddess of Light looked thoughtful. "I was just thinking about Persephone. She's extremely powerful, and her allegiance seems to be with her husband. Meanwhile, he hasn't even shown his face since the introductory speech he gave us while you were fighting Medusa."

"I missed that?" Pit asked. Palutena sighed. "Sorry, sorry. Off topic."

"It's all right." Palutena smiled. "We can worry about that later. I'll get cooking."

()

"So, Hades' wife is a master swordswoman?" Piturai asked between bites of ham.

Palutena set her glass of water down. "Yes, she had Pit beat within seconds. And don't go making any remarks, Piturai. She'd have beaten you too." She had to taise her voice a bit to be heard over the clattering of utensils and the laughter of the celebrating Centurions.

Pit stopped shoveling food into his mouth and took a breath. "And we haven't gotten anything from the Olympians?"

Palutena frowned. "Zeus is angry with the humans over something, and since he's the king, the other Olympians can't do much. They're deadlocked."

"You gods," Piturai muttered.

Phosphora, who had hardly touched her food, was the last one to speak before everything went to hell. (Well, they were already in a cavern in the Underworld, but you get the idea.) "Why would Hades wait this long after his introduction to launch an attack?"

"For poetic justice, of course!" came the booming reply as the entire palace shook and explosions shattered the small buildings on the outskirts of Skyworld. The Centurions panicked and began running in random directions, grabbing random weapons and struggling to armor up. Pit, his dark counterpart, and Phosphora were out on the balcony within seconds, staring in anger and horror at the wave of Underworld troops pouring through the entrance to the cavern, several miles away. Standing in their midst was the intangible image of the green-and-purple man Pit had seen in his dream a couple chapters ago.

Hades. King of the Underworld.

The trio of heroes lept from the balcony and flew a short distance toward the approaching swarm of enemies, Pit falling just a bit behind before Palutena's power-of-flight kicked in. The light goddess' bow appeared in Pit's hand while Piturai flipped around his custom staff (which he'd been using as an aristocrat's cane) and Phosphora's scarf transformed into a bow. Centurions joined them in the air, and they engaged the first of the enemies.

Palutena slowly stood from her chair, finding it difficult to move while keeping her commander airborne. "Hades, why have you come here?" she said aloud, her godly voice carrying all the way to the other god's ears hundreds of miles away. Of course, it appeared as though he was there in Skyworld, but his physical presence was actually far away.

"Oh dear, pretty Palutena. Please tell me you did not just ask that question."

The goddess wanted to scream. "I did, and I would like an answer."

"Tut tut. I thought you were keen to point out the obvious. As the Goddess of Light, you stand in my way more than your mother Athena, or even my dear brother Zeus for that matter."

Palutena cringed slightly. She didn't like bringing up her mother. "What do you mean, 'stand in your way'?"

"World domination, stupid. I'm gonna take out my extended family and rule the world. It's something I've always wanted to do, from the moment Sparky took Dad's scythe from my hands and cut him into bloody pieces! I never got to have any fun."

Palutena reached her shrine, which had no roof or walls and hung off the back of her palace. A group of 4 elite Centurion Strongarms and 6 elite archers, Squad Omega, had already arrived, and one came forward with her staff and her new blade. She'd had it custom ordered for an occaision like this. She nodded her thanks as she took the weapons and stood in the center of the shrine. "Hades, I've got two words for you."

The exiled Olympian was gleeful. "Oh, goody! I love last words!"

Palutena struck her staff against the floor and held her blade skyward as it built up energy for a charge shot.

"Bring it."

()

The heat and light given off by the explosions made it as though Skyworld was inside a star. (Not a compressed one in the Space Pirate Ship, a full-sized one.) Towers crumbled and fountains burst, sending rubble and water flying into the air. The majority of the two armies were locked in a frenzied melee, and the Centurions were quickly being overrun. They were greatly outnumbered and still weary from the battle with Viridi's fleet.

Despite this, Pit and company were dishing out serious damage from a short distsnce away. They aimed for weakened buildings off in the distance, causing them to collapse right on top of the Underworld troops. A flurry of shots raced toward the trio, but Phosphora grabbed the two angels by their robes and pulled them out of harms way with lightning speed. Piturai used the momentum to fling himself up above a nearby building, firing a beam of energy down into a cluster of unsuspecting Monoeyes. Three fired at him as they drew closer, and he beat them down at close range.

The cloud of enemies was getting thicker and thicker. As one of Pit's arrows blew a hole in their ranks, he caught a glimpse of at least two Belunka's spawning more and more hideous creatures. "Piturai! Phosphora!" he called out. "Come with me! We've got to take down those Belunka's!" His companions joined him, and they rocketed into the ranks of the attackers side by side. They slashed and smashed their way through Monoeyes, Miks, and Groucho Marxes (okay, _Specknoses_) as they became engulfed in the Underworld Army. The monsters were less and less competent the farther from the battle they were, probably because they weren't expecting to fight. Finally, our trio of heroes reached the Belunka fleet that surrounded the smirking image of Hades. The colossal god raised an eyebrow when they came into view.

"Hmm, you've done as well as I'd expected so far, slaves of Light." Hades chuckled at his own remark. "Let's see if you can impress me."

Pit yelled up at the purple-green man, "OH, YOU BET WE'LL-..." Phosphora punched him lightly, cutting him off.

"Focus, idiot!" Piturai called while racing ahead to bomb some Belunkas.

"Well, I was going to say it nicer, but yeah," the Lightning Flash said. She and Pit split up and also began bombing big bad Belunkas in a boisterous manner.

The fight was going well.

()

NOT.

Though the Centurions had manned their battle chariots and were properly armed and armored at this point, they were vastly outnumbered. The Forces of Nature had had more firepower than the Underworld Army, but they'd also had an obvious exploitable weakness that Hades' army did not share. In fact, flaming weapons seemed no more effective than plain weapons against the attackers. Palutena was seeing more and more enemies almost get past the palace, just peeking out from behind its walls before her Cenurions killed them. She knew her role in the fight would not be a question of "if," but rather, "when." When the next Monoeye appeared around the side of the palace, it was immediately hit with a blast from Palutena's blade.

She turned to the captain of Centurion Squad Omega, a taller archer in shining white armor. "Allos, tell the interior guards to activate the Juggernauts."

"With all due respect, ma'am, the Juggernauts are still unstable prototypes." Palutena didn't respond. She just held his gaze, and he got the message. He ran into the palace and descended a flight of stairs to Hangar 0.

Moments later, the hangar doors opened just under Palutena's shrine and released the three operational prototype Juggernaut automatons. The devices operated on artificial souls manufactured by Hermes Industries (Hermes. Just keeps going and going and going...) and were armed with two side-mounted gunpowder firearms and a center-mounted fireball catapult. The stability issues mainly resulted from the weapons systems, which were new technology and jammed frequently. Blueprints for jam-free fully automatic firearms had been drawn up, but not yet acted upon.

With all the technical mumbo jumbo out of the way, the flying machine gun robots took up positions behind the Goddess of Light and Centurion Squad Omega. When the next Monomiknose rose over the roof of the palace, it was promptly riddled with bullet holes and wasn't even able to seperate into the unfortunate monsters it was made up of. More and more enemies began flooding around the palace, and the shrine quickly became an arena.

()

On the front lines, things were also going downhill.

By this point, most of the Belunkas had been killed, but taking them out had done nothing to thin the ranks of the Underworld Army. Piturai, not the most patient guy, screamed in rage while he pummeled several enemies with his bare hands. "There has GOT to be a way to take these guys out!"

Phosphora charged and released a shockwave all around herself to put some distance between her and a swarm of Wave Anglers. "We just have to keep fighting!"

Looking over at the ex-servant of Nature, Piturai remembered something: the strongest weapon in the world (besides the signature weapons of the Olympians) was locked in a vault in Palutena's palace. After dodging the lasers of several Grazers, he shouted, "You guys finish off the Belunkas! I'll be right back!" With that, he turned and flew back towards the palace, arriving in a split second.

Pit turned just in time to see his counterpart leave the battlefield. "Phosphora, what the hell is he doing?!" Phosphora shrugged, ducked under a Mik's tongue-slap, and raced off to finish killing the Belunkas. Pit had no choice but to do the same.

()

Palutena launced a sphere of energy from her staff at a couple of Shrips, then started shooting at a squad of Paramushes with her blade. Centurion Squad Omega had taken to the air above, below, and around the shrine to protect the Goddess of Light. Several Kerons managed to leap onto the shrine, with a Skuttler on the back of each one. A Centurion glanced at the monsters approaching the goddess, but she yelled, "Keep your eyes on the air! I'm fine down here!" That was a lie, and the Centurion knew it, but he followed orders and kept fighting. The Juggernauts were doing their job well, and only one of the six total guns had jammed so far, but without a miracle, they feared the battle couldn't be won.

()

In the inner chambers of Palutena's palace, Piturai reached the vault. The door was three meters by three meters, made of solid platinum half a meter thick. There was no visible way to open the door, as it was sealed with magic. The dark angel began prying at the corners of the door (which was really more of a slab of platinum) and firing shots from his staff at the tiny space between the door and the wall. It didn't budge.

Piturai slammed his fist against the door. Was there really no way for anyone besides Palutena to get in?! Were they all going to die here just because the goddess was scared of power?!

Just as he was about to give up and head back out, Piturai heard what sounded like faint whispering. It was coming from...behind the door? Upon closer inspection, he saw tiny vined growing through the cracks in the door. The security system, which consisted of basic light magic, seared the vines, and they recoiled as if they were in pain. Not knowing why, the dark angel grabbed the vines with his fingertips and pulled them out, somehow stretching them so that they reached outside the door. Seeing similar vines on the other side, he realized what was happening. He grabbed those vines as well and pulled all of them together in the center of the door. He tied them together, and they still somehow held up. Moments later, Piturai's jaw dropped as the door was ripped put of the wall and fell to the floor of the vault. The vines retreated into the moss-covered box they had come from.

Having already decided what he was going to do, Piturai stepped into the vault and inspected the box containing the tainted Three Sacred Treasures. He knew very well of the danger wielding the Treasures posed now that Viridi had corrupted them, but he had no choice. Satisfied with the box's conditon, he kicked it open. The earthen armor and liquid Mirror Shield formed over his clothes, and the thorny rose-covered Bow of Light formed in his gloved left hand. The Wings of Pegasus attached to the back of the armor just under his wings, and the vines that had brought down the vault door strapped them in place. He'd give those to Pit when he went back outside. The Power of Flight was probably about to run out, if Palutena was even still providing it.

Now equipped with the Treasures, Piturai flew recklessly through the halls of the palace, blasting Underworld troops who had wandered inside, and re-entered the fray.

()

The flaming wreckage of the Juggernauts was falling to the surface of the cave miles below, at terminal velocity. Two of the Centurions defending Palutena had been blown to sparkling golden bits, and the rest of Squad Omega had been joined by a few grunt soldiers who had managed to find their way back to the shrine. Palutena was diverting all of her focus and energy to fighting, which meant that Pit was probably on the ground at this point. The Goddess of Light hacked, slashed, and clubbed anything that got too close. There were so many Underworld troops that it was impossible to pick a target. Another Centurion burst into golden ichor and confetti-like particles.

Suddenly, a blur of motion rushed past Palutena, and every monster on one side of her was gone. The blur came by again - it was clearly a person, slashing the aggressors to bits quickly and with unrivaled power. When it stopped in the air, the goddess saw that ot was Piturai, wearing the cursed Sacred Treasures.

"Piturai!" she called out, still fighting off hordes of enemies. "What are you doing with the Treasures?!"

He roundhouse kicked several monsters and fired a charge shot - a strange, rose-like projectile surrounded by a bizarre mixture of light and shadows - to help Allos deal with the twenty enemies attacking him, the number now reduced to ten. Piturai turned back toward Palutena. "We're trying to _win_ this battle!" Vines and other plant life now covered the shrine, but really, how bad could that possibly be? (Well, probably very bad, 'cause this is a fictional story.) "I'm gonna take the Wings of Pegasus to Pit! Just hang tight!" With that, the dark angel flew off, blasting every Underworlder in his path. Palutena didn't have the time or the energy to do anything besides resume fighting the legions of the Underworld.

()

"Hey Pitstain!" The angel heard his counterpart call his name. "Pit!"

"I'm up here!" Pit called back from atop a statue of Palutena that looked like it was about to crumble. The Power of Flight was gone, and he was fighting off a hundred Underworld troops with little to no mobility.

Piturai grabbed the Wings of Pegasus off his back and tossed them to Pit. "Catch!"

Pit caught the wings and just looked at them. "You're using the Treasures?!"

"Just put the damn wings on!" the dark angel yelled as he raced off to help Phosphora without fighting any of Pit's foes.

Pit sighed and let the Wings slip over his own. He felt them unfurl and enchant his bow with the familiar power-up. After loosing a shot at his enemies, he felt thin vines wrap around his midriff. The weren't hurting him, but he knew that it still couldn't be a good thing. Pushing the thought to the back of his mind, he leapt into the air and continued fighting with renewed energy.

()

Phosphora had finished off the Belunkas and was now firing blindly into the swarm of Underworld troops all around her. Hades was laughing his godly ass off watching his enemies struggle to survive his enslaught. His eyes widened when he saw Piturai, then he doubled over, laughing maniacally. "Goodness! I knew Viridi had gotten her dirty little hands on the Treasures, but you truly look ridiculous!"

The dark angel sneered and shot a pair of Grazers behind Phosphora. She looked at him and frowned. "You're using the Treasures?"

"Why is that all anyone's concerned about?!" he spat. "We need to win this battle to stay alive, and this is the only way to do it!" Not waiting for a response, he flew into the heart of the Underworld Army, slashing and shooting anything that moved.

Rather than drawing this out any longer with pointless details, I'm just going to throw a transition in here. See you in an hour for Piturai, a second for us.

()

What remained of Hades' army scattered and fled the ruins of Skyworld, racing to escape the cavern that had become a grave for their brethren. (The Underworld is a rather fitting grave, really.) Nearly every structure was destroyed besides Palutena's palace, which had miraculously survived the frenzied battle (except the vault). Only about a hundred Centurions had survived, and though the Goddess of Light was capable of reviving them, such a feat would require massive amounts of energy and time that she wouldn't have for a long while. The image of Hades remained to survey the carnage. "Hmm, I think I have to say your slaves won, pretty Palutena! Well, I'd love to stay and chat...okay, no I wouldn't. Ta ta!" With that, the God of the Underworld disappeared.

What remained of Skyworld's population returned to the palace. Palutena coaxed the remaining grunt Centurions to finish their cold food from earlier, then met with Pit, Piturai, Phosphora, and Allos in her throne room. The dark angel was removing the Treasures and placing them back in the box. His goody-goody counterpart removed the Wings of Pegasus and placed them in the box before locking it. Palutena then sealed it with magic.

With that task complete, she turned to Piturai. "First thing's first. How in Hades did you break into my vault?"

After thinking for a moment, he decided to avoid mentioning that the Treasures were sentient. "I broke your barrier."

"Impossible!" she shot back. "There's no way you could have broken the seal yourself."

"Well I did!" He crossed his arms and smiled smugly. "Guess you're not as powerful as you think!"

Pit came between them. "Hey, Palutena, maybe the seal was weakened because you had to divert your attention to fighting and keeping me flying?"

She took a deep breath. "I guess you might be right." She took one more look at everyone and said, "I need to rest. Good night, or day, or whatever the heck time it is." She left the room, leaving Pit to stare angrily at Piturai.

"Alright, _Ptooey_, how did you break into the vault?"

Phosphora visibly cringed as the two stared each other down. Piturai rather suspiciously said, "None of your business."

Pit clenched his fists. "It's entirely my business! As Palutena's captain, it's my responsibility to-..."

"DO YOU EVER SHUT UP?!" Piturai screamed. "You are literally the single most annoying person I've ever met!"

"YOU'VE NEVER MET ANYBODY, HELLHOUND!" Pit yelled back.

Phosphora pulled them apart. "Both of you STOP!" She looked at Piturai and said, "Pit is not annoying," then looked at Pit and said, "Piturai is not a hellhound." Taking a step back, she said to both of them, "Let's all just get some sleep and worry about this crap in the morning, okay?" When they didn't respond, she repeated, "_OKAY_?" The two angels begrudgingly nodded in agreement, careful not to look at each other. After a moment's hesitation, the three of them retired to their bedrooms.

()

Piturai slipped into comfortable pants and a shirt with slits cut in the back for angel wings. Black, of course. He put out the lone candle in the small room and sat on the queen-sized bed, then heard a knock on the door. Annoyed that the candle was already out, he stood and opened the door to see the Lightning Flash, dressed in similar white nightwear just a bit too small so that part of her stomach was showing. She'd picked the shirt out with this knowledge just because she was used to revealing clothing. (And no, there will be no lemons in this story. Was there a lemon in the novel Divergent? No. So don't even think about it.)

Piturai rubbed his eyes. "What's up?"

The normally bold girl seemed somewhat nervous. "I...I just wanted to say...you really saved our asses out there today, regardless of how you did it." She smiled, and he smiled back.

"Heh, yeah, kinda. I'd do anything to save your ass. Wait..." he paused. "What the heck did I just say?"

She giggled. "It was sweet. You know, in a not-so-sweet way. Heh." She stood there awkwardly for a minute, rocking back and forth on her toes, and then got up the nerve to kiss him lightly on the mouth. His eyes widened, any sleep-related thoughts forgotten, and he stood totally still, slightly confused and not willing to ruin the moment. The few seconds the kiss lasted felt like a lifetime before Phosphora broke off and whispered, "Good night."

She walked away down the torchlit hall, and Piturai barely remembered to quietly call after her, "Good night, Phosphora." Worried he might be dreaming, he slowly closed the door, got into bed, and let sleep wash over him.

* * *

><p><strong>Do you guys think I should split this into two chapters for new readers? Do you support the romantic drama? Have I broken the fourth wall enough? Let me know in a reviewbasically the equivalent of a YouTube comment!**


	7. Plot Twists, 4th Walls, and Cheese

The destruction of his home wasn't enough for Pit to lose his appetite. After consuming more than his share of the previous night's feast, he was now wolfing down more than his share of leftovers for breakfast.

His dark counterpart stood against a wall and looked emo, impatiently waiting for Palutena and Phosphora to arrive and discuss his punishment for _saving their damn lives_. He couldn't believe how thickheaded the Goddess of Light was being, not thanking him for breaking out the Treasures and driving back the entire Underworld Army. Desperate times had called for desperate measures, and Piturai had answered.

He didn't have to wait very long, since the two young-but-not-really-that-young women both showed up in the dining hall a few minutes later. The sight of the Lightning Flash nearly caused his steely exterior to melt as he remembered the brief kiss they'd shared the night before. He managed to keep his lay-it-on-too-thick cool and pushed off the wall, glaring at Palutena. "So, 'Pretty Palutena', how are you going to kill me?"

She returned the glare. "Don't be an idiot. I don't plan on harming a powerful ally any time soon."

He wasn't surprised. "I don't suppose I'm being rewarded for practically winning an entire war, either."

The goddess faltered for just a slight moment, barely enough to let Piturai know he'd gotten to her. "You are most certainly not! You know Viridi cursed the Treasures, and Viridi is a powerful enemy. She probably has some sort of mental link to them, which would mean she knows you just begged her for help!"

Piturai clenched his fists and resisted screaming. "What the hell would that have to do with anything?! The Treasures don't belong to Viridi; they're ours to use! And even if she thinks I 'asked for her help', what advantage would that give her?" He took a step toward Palutena. "You know what I think? You're scared witless because you know you can't keep yourself - or the world - safe unless you get help from people you don't trust, like me."

"Of course I don't trust you!" she shot back. "You're a malevolent being created by a dark artifact belonging to an enemy of mine, and you deliberately chose to wield a weapon that was cursed by another enemy of mine!"

At that point, Pit rose from his seat and walked quickly toward the two, but he was stopped by Phosphora. "Pit," she pleaded, "please don't pitch in just to knock down Piturai." He opened his mouth to protest, but she continued, forcing herself to sound aggressive. "He did save all of us yesterday, and we should be working on planning our next move rather than discussing an action that had at least _seemed _our only remaining option at the time."

He tried to speak, but couldn't argue with her point...or her beautiful blue eyes. He sighed as his anger mostly subsided. "Fine." She smiled.

The opposite effect was occurring for the two arguing. "You've done nothing to prove your loyalty to me. - I mean us!" Palutena yelled, saying the last bit hastily and more quietly.

Piturai scoffed. "Well now we get it! You being a goddess and all, you and your image are more important than your allies."

The goddess was taken aback. "That...I didn't mean that! Why do you feel the need to undermine my statements and avoid my questions?!"

Piturai couldn't think of any way to undermine her statement or avoid her question. He turned around and walked out onto the balcony. "I need some fresh Underworld air." Before anyone could argue, he took off and rocketed toward the mouth of the cavern, the purple glow of his wings quickly disappearing from sight.

Palutena took a deep breath and let it out slowly, sitting down at the table where her now-cold waffles had been set by the surviving Centurion chef. Pit walked over to her, "Should I follow him, Lady Palutena?"

She sighed. "No, Pit. He'll be back. In the meantime, I need to re-seal the Treasure Vault."

Pit nodded. "Okay. Though if you're getting up now, the sentence about the waffles..."

"You can eat them if you don't break the fourth wall right now."

"Deal!"

()

But while Pit munched the waffles, Phosphora chewed her Nutri-Copyright bar, and Palutena sealed up the treasures with a stronger spell, shady business was about to go on out over the Magma Sea. Piturai was just out to calm himslf down. _I really can be a bit pushy_, he thought to himself. He was just deciding that he'd try to avoid fighting his own allies when he heard a somewhat familiar voice speak quietly in his ear.

_"Hey, Dark Pit!"_

He whipped around and saw nobody, but a tiny red flower on his left shoulder caught his eye. It was attached to a thin vine that curled around his wing. "What the...Viridi!" he exclaimed. "What is this?!"

_"Hey, shut up, will ya? Palutena and Hades both have god-hearing, and I'll be a wilted rose within a day if they catch me talking to you."_

He lowered his voice, but didn't change his tone. "So Palutena was right - you did bug the Treasures!"

_"That's not important. You need to listen to me."_

"And why should I?"

_"I want to help you earn your freedom." _Before he could question the preteen-not-preteen goddess, she continued. _"Right now, all three of our armies - and the Olympians - want you on their side. You're dangerous, and until you die, lose your powers, or kill every one of us, you'll be sought after and hunted."_

"Yeah, that's called my life. And I'm into it right now. So if you could just shut your mouth and be a good little plant b-" As he raised his hand to crush the flower, she screamed in his ear.

_"Wait! I can hide the flower. Palutena won't notice! Just keep in contact with me!"_

"Why should I?" The dark angel's hand closed around the flower.

_"Phosphora will turn on you, too!"_

He hesitated. She took the opportunity to keep talking. _"You'll never be able to go adventuring with her, or to settle down with her! You probably won't even get to-"_

"Quiet!" he yelled. She stopped. He took a breath to clear his anger before speaking again. "How much do you know about-"

_"I know you kissed her. And I know that you both enjoyed it! So, keep the flower?"_

"I..." he thought for a moment, and his hand fell to his side. "Hide this damn thing, and never talk to me unless you have to." The Goddess of Nature didn't respond; she didn't have to. Instead, the flower curled its petals inward and shrank, and the vine became shorter until it could slip between his wing and his skin. He tentatively moved his wing; he couldn't even feel the "natural" communication device. He shook his head and flew back in the direction of New Skyworld Cavern, praying to...himself, that this didn't backfire horribly.

()

Piturai had only been gone for half an hour when he returned to Palutena's palace. The goddess was just finishing with sealing the Treasure vault, and Pit was performing repairs on the roof. Phosphora was still standing on the dining hall balcony, and she smiled when she saw the dark angel appear over the ruined buildings of Skyworld. He landed next to her and nonchalantly said, "Hey."

She smirked. "Well, someone's back sooner than expected! Are you feeling better?"

He held his smile and fought the urge to reach behind him and feel for Viridi's plant. "Yeah, I was acting like a royal ass. Though Palutena wasn't much better." He felt his face slowly warming over the next couple seconds and his cheeks became slightly red (he was...nervous? That hadn't happened before.), until he said, "Hey, Phosphora, can we talk about...last night?"

She also blushed a bit (her previous relationships had been less intimate, often one date per boyfriend) and responded, "Um, yeah. I...I wasn't, like, half-asleep back there. I really do think that how you saved us was awesome and heroic."

"Uh, th-thanks," he stammered. ... Stammered? Wow, she had a serious effect on him. For a few more extremely long seconds, they stood silently, with her expression shifting from slight embarassment to hopefullness. Piturai almost slapped himself when he realized what the Lightning Flash wanted to hear. "I really like you too, Phosphora."

She giggled. When he looked confused, she said, "You're showing such a soft side! You really are a nice guy. And a fiction novel stereotype, but one that's legitimately attractive!"

"Er...thanks?"

They stood awkwardly for a few seconds (as my forever alone teenage boy mind believes new couples do). Then Piturai decided that even if he was going soft, he wasn't a coward. He took a step forward to close the distance between them, put his arm on her waist, and kissed her gently. She returned the gesture with equal tenderness and obliviousness to the angel who had been fixing the roof when his dark copy returned.

Pit leaned back, away from the edge of the roof over the balcony, and resisted the urge to scream. Why the heck did Phosphora fall for him so quickly?! As the chapter came to a close, he muttered, "One hell of a stereotype."

* * *

><p><strong>So cheesy and cliché, but it won't stay that way for long! ... Hopefully. As I said, I have no idea what twists and turns this story will take, so remember to review and PM ideas. No idea sucks!<strong>

**Note: In the last chapter, I implied that my target audience was teenage girls by referring to Divergent as lemony fanfic-fuel without an actual lemon in it. I apologize for that, as I know that teenage girls are probably the smallest demographic of this site. If you are a teenage girl, then I conversely apologize for that assumption.**

**Peace out!**


	8. Zeus Takes No Crap

**Sweet Elysium, it's been a year! Anyway, the new chapter is finally here!**

**I'm going to note that I take quite a liberty in fabricating a bit of extra backstory in this chapter, so take it with a grain of salt and remember to review!**

* * *

><p>"Palutena's little angels are strong, my darling," Hades said. "Pit and the lightning girl I could take with brute force, but the Mirror clone is a loose canon."<p>

Persephone feigned interest as she listened to her husband. "And what does that mean for you, my king?"

The Lord of the Underworld smirked. "My sweet Springtime, how many times must I tell you not to call me 'my king'? I'd much prefer 'my love'. Oh, that's too sappy for you, perhaps. Maybe a nickname? What about Pluto?" He shrugged. "But I digress. I mean that Dark Pit - if he keeps Pandora's powers - could very well upset the balance of godly power in the world by changing allegiances and slaying deities. And we all know that is _my_ job!" He turned to look out a window of the thirteenth floor of his palace, which opened out above the Fields of Punishment - the best part of his kingdom, where the souls of those who led sinful lives were tortured for all eternity. The screams of the damned were music to his twisted ears. "However, I might find a use for the dark angel."

The Queen of Hell didn't particularly care whether angels lived or died, but gods were another matter. "You expect to win the angel to your side and overthrow Olympus by force?"

Hades pretended to look offended. "Persephone, you know I always carefully plan my actions. Yesterday's attack was an excuse to observe how our enemies and unaffiliates react under stress."

"We don't have enough souls entering our realm to fund more armies like that."

"I can always kill a few million mortals," the ex-Olympian said without missing a beat. "No skin off my semi-intangible, fiery back. The battle was well worth it, as I was able to force Dark Pit to take up the Three Sacred Treasures. The Goddess of Whining, Viridi, had them bugged, and now she has established communication with him. And the suckers honestly think I can't intercept their calls. I provide the service in this region!"

Persephone shook her head. "What in the name of here did you just say?"

Her husband/captor chuckled. "Never mind that. Let's have dinner! I want some fresh produce before your mother Demeter kills all the plants over the next few weeks."

()

Palutena radiated her power out to the pools of ichor in the Resurrection Chamber within her palace. She grunted and gasped as her strength left her, and Pit had to catch her before she hit the polished tile floor of the large, domed grey room. The golden liquid in the tubs churned for a few moments, and a squadron of reborn Centurions dressed in loincloths erupted from them and saluted the Goddess of Light. She smiled. "Commander Gol, and your soldiers. I am happy to see you again!" Godly sweat dripped from her skin, which Pit pretended to ignore while he propped her up. He didn't like seeing her like this, almost completely drained of her magic, but she needed to bring her entire Centurion army back to life before Nature or the Underworld launched another attack. There was no other way.

"Lady Palutena," the angel said, "I think it's best if you take a break. Maybe soak in a hot spring for a while." He smiled weakly, his fear for her safety clearly showing. He didn't want her to be exhausted like this if they were ambushed again.

She decided that she would, if not just so her loyal friend could stop worrying abut her. "That sounds very nice, Pit." She stood, leaning gently on his shoulder. "I can make it to the Sky Springs on my own. Thank you." She took a couple of tender steps to test the truth of her own words, then set off slowly for the springs. As she walked, the goddess took deep breaths of the slightly sour aether, tainted by Underworld air, and looked mournfully to the artificial morning sky produced by the crystal walls of Skyworlds current cave locale. She reached the springs just a minute later, a barrier of partially solid one-way mist appearing around her to give her some privacy.

Meanwhile, Pit sighed and walked to the kitchen. Food usually cheered him up when he was feeling lousy (a rather bad habit that a certain fanfiction author shares; surprisingly, both of us remain skinny). Not a moment after he passed through the door, he caught a bag containing a sandwich and a drink thrown by the Centurion Strongarm chef, who could hear the angel's stomach growling across Skyworld. "Oh, thanks!" Pit called to the chef, who merely grunted in acknowledgment. His worries temporarily forgotten, the captain of Palutena's guard dug into the meal.

()

Piturai face-kicked a Skuttler into a pile of rubble from Medusa's decimated castle. He looked around, Electroshock Arm at the ready, for any more Underworld assailants. Thirty meters above him, Phosphora sniped a Ganamede with a Laser Staff as it tried to escape. The pair had come to the ruins to see if they could recover any clues on the whereabouts of Hades' real headquarters, but instead they'd encountered a ragtag groups of soldiers from the Underworld Army, who had been trying to suck up leftover magic essence using what looked like vacuum cleaners. Chances were that the idiots had come here without orders, hoping to get promoted for "taking initiative," or something like that.

The Lightning Flash settled on the ground next to the dark angel. "Well, that was fun," she said.

He smirked. "We should keep score next time. Play a round of, 'Who Killed More Worthless Monsters'!" They chuckled together at the lame joke, but Piturai's smile faded rather quickly. "Hey, Phosphora..."

"Woah, serious face," she said, only half-kidding.

He continued. "I know I shouldn't care, but do you think I'm...dangerous? Like some kind of liability to our alliance?" He couldn't tell her about his contact with Viridi yet, but he wanted to know if his new girlfriend and fellow warrior trusted him.

"Uh, no..." Phosphora murmered just a bit too slowly. "I'd say you know what your freedoms should be and where your loyalties lie, and that's all that matters." _At least for now, _she thought.

Her companion's smile returned, though it seemed a tad forced. "Thanks, I'm sure you're right," he said with some relief.

They stood still for a moment before she edged closer and briefly kissed him. "Come on," she said. "Let's head back to Skyworld. There's nothing else worth investigating here."

()

Palutena sensed the pair returning as she finished putting on a fresh, purple dress. _"Welcome back," _she called telepathically. _"Find anything worth noting?"_

"Nope," Piturai said aloud. "Just some dumb skeleton guys."

"Hades is being pretty darn quiet, all things considered," offered the Lightning Flash.

"Hmm..." sighed the goddess. Suddenly, she felt a sharp pain just below her forehead. "Huh-?! Agh!" The sight and sounds of the bubbling hot spring and flying Centurions vanished, and she felt a dragging sensation as she flew at mach speed through red and black rock, then through golden colored clouds in a bright sky of aether, all the while not receiving a single scratch. Finally, she rose through a floor of polished marble tiles and was dropped back onto it.

She used her hands for support to try and get up, nearly falling back down upon seeing that her arms were transparent - she'd been pulled from her physical body. She closed her eyes and cursed, reopening them to see the once-familiar Throne Room of the Gods. White was the dominant color by far in the chamber. Colossal white marble columns held the weight of the massive ceiling, which was a mosaic that magically filled itself in with murals and paintings that mortals on the Earth's surface had created to worship the gods. Sparkling fountains of crystal were placed in the walls between each pair of columns leading up to the semicircle of twelve large thrones, each custom-made for one of the twelve Olympians. Only one throne, the largest of the bunch, made from gold and platinum in a striped pattern, was occupied.

And Zeus, King of Olympus, was not happy.

"Palutena. So glad you could make it," the fearsome, bearded god said without any humor in his voice.

The minor goddess caught her breath quickly in the divine air. "Could we please skip the sad attempts at jokes, Your High-And-Mightyness?"

Zeus sneered. "Very well. I've got a few things to say to you, Goddess of Light."

"Can we make it quick?" she retorted. "I'm kinda fighting a war between light and darkness right now, and somehow I doubt you're about to offer me any help."

Lightning crackled along his calloused fingers, and his sneer intensified. "Your commander's clone, the black-winged angel Dark Pit, still has Pandora's powers of chaos, including unlimited flight. If the original was strong enough to kill both Pandora and Medusa, does his doppelgänger pose a threat to the other gods with his additional powers?"

Palutena looked down at the floor briefly, unsure of how to respond. "Dark Pit...seems to be in a romantic relationship with the Lightning Flash, Phosphora, and she is loyal to the forces of light. I'm also monitoring his actions despite giving him some decent breathing space, so I am confident that he will stay on our side."

"_Your _side, sure," the God of the Sky remarked. "But is he a threat to _me _and the other Olympians?"

Palutena was taken aback. "You don't trust _me_."

He sighed deeply, a charged thundercloud forming from the breath as it left him. "I know that you care greatly for the humans, whereas I still don't see the worth in their free will. I also know that you are not fond of your parents, Athena and Apollo."

She flinched at the mention of her godly parents. Zeus was right; she cared very little for the Goddess of Wisdom and the God of the Sun. "Sire, I bear no ill will toward you, my parents, or any of the Olympian gods. My enemies are Pan's daughter Viridi and your brother Hades."

"Do not mention the eccentric Lord of the Underworld in my presence."

"Sorry. My point is that I will never betray the Olympians. Even if I wanted to, my power will never be great enough to do so."

Zeus grinned. Hearing of his own greatness compared to others' powerlessness was one of few things that brought him true joy. "Thank you, Palutena. You are dismissed." He waved his hand and the goddess fell through the floor, descending at impossible speeds back to her body.

She shot upright, surprising Pit, Piturai, and Phosphora, who had carried her to the Skyworld Hos-PIT-al. The Centurion medics mostly specialized in treating patients polymorphed into garden vegetables and fried seafood, so the trio was relieved when their commanding officer awoke on her own just moments after being placed in a bed.

"Woah!" Pit yelled. "Uh, hey, Palutena! Where'd you go...and/or not go?"

The goddess moved to stand, waving off silent offers of help from her allies and quickly getting to her feet. "Zeus wanted a word with me. He's always been a bit of a windbag, though he kinda earned that by being God of the Sky." The others didn't seem to understand. "Part of my divine sould is tethered to Olympus, so without any effort or ceremony, a major god like him can bring my soul there without moving my body."

"Okay," Piturai muttered. "That's fine and dandy. But why did he want to speak with you?"

Palutena frowned. "He wanted to hear from the horse's mouth - not to compare my lovely visage to a horse - that we weren't planning to betray him."

"And?"

She faltered. "I...told him the truth. We have no intention to attack the Olympians at any point in the future, and we aren't a threat to the balance of divine power in the world."

Pit and Phosphora turned silently to Piturai, awaiting his response. He snickered. "Of course. Not sure what the big guys upstairs are scared of. We're protecting their domain, if anything!"

Palutena nodded. "You can say that again." An awkward moment of uneasy silence passed over the group as everyone, including Pit's faulty clone, tried to figure out what Piturai's end goal would be as the blatantly overpowered hero - or villain - of the story. After a few seconds, the goddess spoke up again. "So, how about lunch?" Food seemed to be the one thing that everybody could calmly come together over, as the team agreed to head to the banquet hall for some food.


End file.
